So, I get this little Victoria Secret pamphlet in the mail telling of their wild kingdom sale going on, with animal print on everything! I love leopard print, and as they so typically do, the brochure comes with a panty free-be coupon and ten dollars off a bra. I'm pretty broke that day, but I'm not gonna pass up these sexy little undies that all the models are rockin! And of course, I can't just go in and not buy anything, so I'll need to get the matching bra...it's not rocket science to figure out their ploy! But I'm gonna bite, needless to say.
I get there and am greeted and asked if I need assistance finding anything. I whip out my coupon (heart-shaped with a close-up groin shot of the model in the goods). The girl points to the table right in front of us, and I say that I do indeed wish to purchase a matching bra. With her hand on the table of lacy unmentionables, she asks my size..."extra small..."...DUH! Look at me man! She looks at me queerly, then realizes I'm talking about the tiny thong goodies on the table..."Oh, I mean bra size...these are one-size-fits-all." Wait, hold the phone!! An empire built upon scantily clad skinny bitches is offering up a one-size-fits-all garment to its' double zero clientele?!? REALLY?
Their ad did everything they wanted it to do...it got me in the store! It had me convinced that I should buy, yet another bra, which I honestly don't need, for 50 (ish) dollars...so long as I get this little piece of fabric that fits into my crotch nice and snug for free! Yup, hook-line-&-sinker I went for it, as many do...but, I can proudly say that I walked out of that store with no lacy anything...this little mouse doesn't want the cheese in your maze, Victoria!!
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